Your Kids Do Not Understand How Hard It Was to Record a Song Off the Radio
The precision timing, the DJ-dodging, the heartbreak of a late press on the record button. We had skills that no Spotify algorithm can replicate.
Latest Dispatches
Retro Tech
Fashion Comebacks
Everything We Wore in 1997 Is Back and We Are Not Getting Credit
Chunky sneakers, oversized flannels, tiny sunglasses. Gen Z thinks they discovered these. We have the photo albums to prove otherwise.
Music Defense
A Definitive Argument That Your Playlist Is Better Than Your Teenager's
Peer-reviewed evidence that the golden era of music ended approximately when your oldest child was born. Contains charts, graphs, and strong opinions.
Gaming
We Beat Games Without Save Points and It Built Character
Modern games have autosave, checkpoints, and difficulty sliders. We had one life, no continues, and a CRT television. Respect your elders.
Nostalgia
The Lost Art of Not Knowing Things Immediately
Before smartphones, disagreements at dinner could last for days. You had to go to the library to win an argument. It was character-building and we miss it.
Style
Cargo Shorts: A Hill We Will Die On
They are practical. They are comfortable. They hold everything. Your children are wrong about them and history will vindicate us.
About Cooler Than Our Kids
We Were Here First
Cooler Than Our Kids is the editorial safe space for parents whose children have the audacity to think they invented good taste. We were wearing vintage before it was called vintage. We were streaming before there was streaming. We had playlists on cassette tapes.
Our Sacred Mission
To document, defend, and celebrate the cultural superiority of people who grew up rewinding VHS tapes, memorizing phone numbers, and surviving dial-up internet. Our kids may have TikTok, but we have credibility.
Who We Are
We are the parents who get caught dancing in the kitchen. The ones whose kids pretend not to know us at school drop-off. The ones who still think cargo shorts have utility. And we are proud.